The point in my life I truly matured both mentally and spiritually is when I realized the need of eschewing pride. As a born-again Christian I already knew my life is not my own to do with as I please, so in regard to the spiritual it was a matter of turning that intellectual understanding into the basis for way of life. As human beings, at some point we all have to face the fact that our capacities are limited and there is no way we can discern well enough to answer or do what is best on our own.
I am also aware that, despite this enlightenment (if I can use a single term that best encompasses such a new plane of understanding), I am still subject to human frailty and accompanying errors in judgment. It is natural for people to believe what they want to believe despite the weight of fact and/or truth saying otherwise (look at commentaries on the news today); not so for the admission of being wrong. Yet in my roles as a leader, husband, father, and [part-time] author, I must set the example in righting such wrongs.
What Went Wrong
It may have been the 007 connection at first, but in the wider sense the Walther PPK is among the most beautiful pistols ever made and it is difficult not to fall in love with it. Despite my first example being a lemon I thought nothing of replacing it with a newer build of the same. For years I consciously wished to looked past the inherent issues with it.
In reviewing my then-new PPK/S I acknowledged its failure rate of 2%. Even if that had not grown rather than shrunk with use over the years (which it has), that should have been enough to show up as a yellow flag at least in regard to an everyday self-defense weapon. My research was less than extensive, leaving me thinking it was a quirk of the American-made models. When I dug deeper it revealed the entire PPK line has proven the .32 ACP it was designed for consistently runs much better then .380. When I realized this I even sent a message to Walther about it, but there has been no indication (since a tease in 2020) of Walther USA considering any new .32 models.
The second matter was easier to adapt to but nevertheless a known issue: any PPK model in .380 pushes back hard, which WILL leave a painful result in the web of the shooting hand whenever so many rounds are discharged in a single session. I must disclaim that this is only authoritative in my experience on the PPK/S: the heavier weight of the original PP (which has become rare and expensive anyway) or different grip style of the regular PPK (which has one less round in the magazine) may make some difference, but I doubt that much. Even though the Walther PPK/S is among the more ergonomic pistols for my smaller-size hands, there are clearly still limits mitigating the harshness of modern .380 ACP in compact straight blowback handguns.
On top of all this even newly-made (in America) Walther PPKs are expensive; buyer's remorse increases in pain the more money involved, even though in my case this factor was mitigated by trading-in my old model. Even in acknowledging this difficult undoing, correcting it is always a challenge between getting a good deal trading-in the old (nigh-impossible with gun dealers who are the safest to sell to but they undercut all the time, often by hundreds) and hoping the replacement does not repeat the mistake with issues of its own. Such is the nature of this kind of market, and I can only hope I get used to it.
Correction
Not the one I have, but accurately representative of it.
The Walther PP was a seminal design all-around: often imitated, and a few times outright duplicated. At least this means that in a quest to find an equivalent replacement in the same caliber there are options. This time around I knew to avoid the trap of getting a made-for-.32-converted-to-.380 as that invited the same reliability issues.
One interesting aspect of this quest was how much I ended up delving into the realm of 9mm Makarov, the Soviet caliber whose models were not only often some derivative of the Walther PP but importation into America frequently came with conversion to the much more Western-friendly .380. It took little time and research to determine that, aside from one or two models, these guns come with too many of their own potential liabilities and if I were to go in that direction I should avoid complication by sticking with the original 9x18mm chambering. This is a subject I should cover further in the future, since one other determination I made is 9x18mm Makarov would be a good addition to my caliber diversity.
I knew 21st century design philosophy for self-defense .380 was insufficient: models are typically made for concealability at expense of all other factors including inherent accuracy and recoil mitigation. In any case, John Browning invented .380 for the category that today would be considered compact: the realm of today's subcompacts is what .25 ACP was originally made for (thus service-caliber subcompacts have no recourse but to focus on recoil mitigation, yet all too often they remain uncomfortable to shoot and their calibers are stunted by the short barrels). I did find a handful of models (all recent releases in fact) that checked the boxes of making great use of .380 while, as compacts and not subcompacts, mitigated the liabilities: Beretta 80X, SIG P365-380 & Walther PK/PD380.
Those three models have such a great balance of features that I'm still considering acquiring one down the road as a "tactical" .380 backup, but none hold a candle to the comfortable deep concealability of a Walther PPK. Then, as if it was meant to be (as a Christian who does not believe in luck/fate I say it was), I spotted an online outlet entry for a lightly-used SIG Sauer P232 with 3 magazines for significantly less than the cost of a new PPK with 2 magazines. This was such a no-brainer bargain I was willing to jump through a little hoop with the FFL that cropped up (but that worked out in the end too). I will save the history and review of this particular model for another post; in summary my newest Type I Classic is here to stay in that role. Its wraparound rubber grips (like those of the PPK but not the PPK/S) added ergonomic points, but most importantly its reliability with all 3 magazines proved 100%. It took minor adjustment but its similar dimensions to the Walther meant I had no need to replace any holsters.
The one key drawback is it isn't quite as beautiful as the PPK, but it comes fairly close. I'm glad I got the all-steel model since the alloy-framed standard ones would lose recoil mitigation points, but I may still have some cosmetic work done on mine so the overall coloring matches. I'm especially thankful it came with 3 reliable magazines: a perfect number for everyday concealed carry, and a huge part of what made the deal such a bargain since they are not made anymore and go for a pretty penny secondhand.
In Retrospect
Chalk the premise of this whole episode to my need to continue my growth towards avoiding judgments on emotional rather than rational basis. I still love the Walther PPK, and am determined that my future will include having one again, but I must set that aside for the sake of practicality at this time. At least I already did my homework on the PPK/S in .22 LR: made in Germany (like the SIG P232), runs with superb reliability so long as the right loads are used, and is one of those rare silencer hosts losing nothing in the aesthetic factor (take that, 007!).
This also changed my thought process on what firearms I keep and their purpose (remember: I never just collect guns, thus anything without a specific shooting role is either a sentimental piece or future trading collateral). I'm still all-in for caliber diversity: as a Millennial I've witnessed several market downturns and their accompanying price hikes, which in the realm of guns means variety is better since I should still be able to acquire ammo for at least one weapon I have. For more common calibers I should probably also have more than one weapon (or weapon component such as barrels for swapping between .40 S&W and .357 SIG) chambering it for backup and more specialized role purposes.
Through it all I need to keep the practical factor in mind. I purchase firearms very infrequently, and each transaction is preceded by months (if not years) of research, preferably along with availing myself of the opportunity to rent a particular model at a local range for try-before-you-buy. And when I discover what works for me I never act as if that is what also ought to work for others. I humbly acknowledge my needs and preferences differ from those of others, but that is part of the rich diversity of humanity.